I am choosing to acknowledge today that God is on the other side of this road.
The book I am reading is an encouraging book on faith and walking with faith through this lonely winding road of loss. I am not saying I am no longer angry with God, but I will acknowledge his presence in some of this situation. I am still angry that the Christian people in my life (some of them) have been the farthest from this situation. THe ones I really expected to be still checking in, especially not seeing us in weeks, haven't even sent a short e-mail, text, letter or anything making sure we're still treading water. That has really dissapointed me and has resonated deep in my heart why I have been so skeptical in the 1st place. But today, I will choose to put that biterness aside, and realize God has to at some point be the center of my faith-or lack of faith-or whatever I am doing right now. I do'nt want anyone to feel sorry for us-but I do want people to acknowledge Ian & Owen-I've talked with people that have gracefully (and sometimes not so gracefully) completely brushed over their existance and the greif we are experiencing-and it makes for a very akward conversation. A bit of advice that I can offer if you're dealing with a friend, family member or church member going through a loss similar to this...don't grace over it-acknowledge it. Acknowledge that they are going through a horrific time, that you CARE about their child(ren). Make sure they know you care about them and if they feel like talking, you're there. Let them know that you want to know about their baby (Babies). It's important to a mothers healing process to know there are people that do ackowledge their children-all of them-even those that couldn't stay on earth. I know that Ian & Owen had a purpose on this earth in their short time. It might have been for me to get involved in things that can help other people. It might be for some miraculous thing we don't know about yet that will make an impact on the world. One thing is for sure-their short lives completely changed mine!
The book I am reading is an encouraging book on faith and walking with faith through this lonely winding road of loss. I am not saying I am no longer angry with God, but I will acknowledge his presence in some of this situation. I am still angry that the Christian people in my life (some of them) have been the farthest from this situation. THe ones I really expected to be still checking in, especially not seeing us in weeks, haven't even sent a short e-mail, text, letter or anything making sure we're still treading water. That has really dissapointed me and has resonated deep in my heart why I have been so skeptical in the 1st place. But today, I will choose to put that biterness aside, and realize God has to at some point be the center of my faith-or lack of faith-or whatever I am doing right now. I do'nt want anyone to feel sorry for us-but I do want people to acknowledge Ian & Owen-I've talked with people that have gracefully (and sometimes not so gracefully) completely brushed over their existance and the greif we are experiencing-and it makes for a very akward conversation. A bit of advice that I can offer if you're dealing with a friend, family member or church member going through a loss similar to this...don't grace over it-acknowledge it. Acknowledge that they are going through a horrific time, that you CARE about their child(ren). Make sure they know you care about them and if they feel like talking, you're there. Let them know that you want to know about their baby (Babies). It's important to a mothers healing process to know there are people that do ackowledge their children-all of them-even those that couldn't stay on earth. I know that Ian & Owen had a purpose on this earth in their short time. It might have been for me to get involved in things that can help other people. It might be for some miraculous thing we don't know about yet that will make an impact on the world. One thing is for sure-their short lives completely changed mine!
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