Life After

It’s hard to believe that it has been almost 3 years since I started this blog. Next Tuesday, Ian and Owen would have been 3 years old. It seems like just last week, I was sitting at the baseball field reading a life with twin’s book and getting excited about my little boys. We started picking out names around this time back then.   I had started to look @ Nursery ideas for 2 little ones. It was on this day in 2011 that I found out my little ones were both boys. I was getting prepared for a house FULL of boys!   Who would have suspected that three years later, I would be sitting here writing this blog about losing 3 of my sons, working through the emotions of a complicated divorce and trying to find myself again.   This is my blog, this is where I go when I have too many words to say and can’t get them from my brain to my mouth. I can bounce back and forth between subjects and I can work through just the tip of the iceberg of my emotions.   I...

Not that I feel like I need to justify myself or my actions to anyone, but I feel like I need to get some things on paper to help MYSELF.   Since this blog has always been about helping myself through writing, there seems to be no more appropriate place…   I can honestly say that I understand how people get themselves in trouble by shutting out the voice in their head telling them to think things through before acting. It’s no surprise to anyone that I am an extremely impulsive and vocal person. I had no reservations discussing my raw emotion during the loss of Ian, Owen and Maddox. I waited a long time out of respect, to share the status of my relationship with Cris which I maintain and healthy and respectful friendship with. I also make no excuses or concessions for saying what is on my mind at any given time…   With all of that said-I have been under an extreme amount of pressure and stress in the last 5 years. I personally feel like I have handle...